Finding Out Who You Are.

I’m as old as the moon and the stars, and as young as the trees and the lakes. My style comes from looking at what came before me, and from visiting a lot of places.~Afrika Bambaataa

See You In A While
doug photo

My daughter as a newborn.

This weekend we dropped my daughter off at the airport in Orlando. She’s flying to Virginia to visit with her mother for six weeks of the summer school break.

I’ve been a full time dad since she moved in with me five months ago, started at a new school and basically had a complete change in life.

We were always close, spending every other weekend together, talking on the phone every night and maintaining a good relationship in spite of not living in the same house. Even when I was still married to her mom my daughter and I were close… I’ve never gone without seeing her for more than two weeks since she was born, except for a month when she was two and I had some work in Belgium.

So now she’s fourteen and will be gone for six weeks. I’m comfortable with that. She’ll be back in time for high school orientation and with lots of stories about summer adventures.

I’m Not Embarrassing To Teenagers Yet, Only To Adults

I’m pleased that I’m still “cool” enough that I’m not an embarrassment to my daughter. Usually teenagers want nothing to do with their parents, or so it seems.

She’s just like me, and always has been. I find new obscure music that we enjoy together. We’re planning to go geocaching when she comes back home…There are dozens of caches within a couple miles of our house… I just put new wheels on my skateboard and I’ll be ready to roll for some end of summer skating. She’s started to read the books I’ve read…

She’s drifting away bit by bit though. I know she texts with some boys and it’s only a matter of time before I’ll be meeting one of them. Make-up and clothing have replaced some of the activities we used to share. She doesn’t tell me about every little thing that happened in her day anymore…

Off for a few weeks...

Off for a few weeks…

That’s OK. That’s how it’s supposed to be. I’ve been a huge, eccentric presence in her life, influencing her and guiding her and helping shape her into the person she is…

A person who would rather read than watch television… Someone who thinks critically and doesn’t just accept what they’re told…

Someone who eats pate, bahn mi and kimchi because food is adventure!

Someone who overcame her fear of flying and now loves it.

I used to think I would dread the day when my daughter would move on and leave me in the past. I now realize I won’t ever be the past.

There’s so much of me in her I’m surprised she doesn’t have a beard… My daughter will grow up, but I’ll always be a part of her life.

I’m not afraid of losing her. It’s exciting to watch her grow, form opinions and move towards being her own person… I laid the foundation and now she’s building her life upon it.

I look forward to seeing how it all turns out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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10 comments

  1. What a wonderful read! My son is 16 and I feel the same way as you about my teenager. They are a joy and it’s so GOOD to hear parents speak highly of their children growing up. Here’s to embracing life!

    Bravo – and happy early Father’s Day 😉

    Peace,

    Allison

    1. Thanks Allison- I enjoy watching my daughter grow and head towards adulthood. Sometimes I wish I could just make her go in certain directions, but that’s not what it’s about…

  2. nicciattfield · · Reply

    It’s amazing how step by step, you love how your children grow, even though I always thought I’d dread each next phase. They are the special ones we love always, and I think when we let them grow, we show how much we love them.

    1. Exactly- I wanted my daughter to stay three forever. Now that she’s growing it’s fun to witness the changes and coices she makes.

  3. Cute article….I can sense you love her so much from the way you have written, more than yourself. She is such a darling…

    1. Thanks! She is…14,and all that entails. There’s still some darling left in there, somewhere!

  4. This post just made my day. You are a completely awesome dad!!!

    1. Thanks Lauren! I try to be. I guess sometimes I succeed…

  5. Lovely! I could really feel the special bond you have with you beautiful daughter😊

    1. Thanks! We do have a great bond.I feel fortunate for it…

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